RIP, Monica.

Monica, a long time friend of mine, passed away last night around 8pm. She was a drug addict. Prescription pills were her drug of choice. I have to keep reminding myself this because my mind keeps falling into self-blame. She suffered from depression and severe pain from scoliosis. I also think she suffered from untreated post partum depression. When she passed, she was in a nursing home. She was brain damaged from dieing on February 3rd, 2007 (overdose), and being resuscitated after having been without oxygen for too long.

Our friendship was in an ebbing state – I had not spoken with her in over a year. But like the song says, I always thought that I’d see her again. I always hoped that she would get better. We have been friends since I was 17 years old, I’m 32 now. I have never had a close friend die before – or anyone close for that matter. This pain feels like a black pit of loneliness.

She has a seven year old son. I’ll only tell him the good stories about his mama. If he ever comes to me with questions, I’ll be honest but loving.